The Basement

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Inside a crate on level 1, you find
SCP-458

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Warehouse form 23521/1α — New Acquisition

Guidelines:

Keep it short & simple
Keep to the same style.
Less is more. Leave it to the reader's imagination. No, more than that.
We already have Jimmy Hoffa, Elvis and Lord Lucan
"Seemingly Ordinary" is seemingly overused.
Boxes within in boxes within boxes within recursion within overuse within warehouse.
Originality beats Hitchhikers Guide references.
Keep it clean.

Description

Inside a crate on level 𝑥, you find ...

Author

5 + 7 = (Proving your humanity^[1])

[1] This doesn't actually prove your humanity, just your ability to deal with integer numerical addition, but our research has suggested that this arrests the progress of both artifical item generators and anyone with a maths degree, and that the latter usually get over it in time.

About

Once upon a time, the deepest dungeons of SJGames' Warehouse 23's basement were free to rummage in by the forces of the internet. Alas, technical problems took down the basement, and while it eventually returned to being toured, it still accepts no new artifacts.

This is an attempt to do the same thing. We don't have the submissions the old one did, nor do we have the vast vault of imagination that the old one was seeded with. We do have vote buttons, though.

This was created by Nicholas Avenell of Istic. It runs on stickyback plastic, string, PHP, MySQL & jQuery. Its favourite letter is d, and its favourite position is the cookie monster. It's not endorsed by SJ Games or anyone involved with the original Warehouse 23 basement, and we don't accept liablity for any distress caused by items you find in it.